5.29.2003      

INTP / Yeah, you know me...

      Every person has his or her own way of doing things. Some of us attempt to get things done immediately, others wait a while and do it later. Some of us think our way through things while others feel our way through. Our personalities are a culmination of the experiences we have encountered in life. However, some of the characteristics that we have are innate. Our minds have predetermined "preferences" that affect the way we behave on a subconscious level.

     I'm bringing this up because I recently stumbled upon a book of personality types and temperaments. I'm currently attending Temple University and I was hopelessly lost in the labyrinth that is the main campus library. (Those of you who know me may be surprised to find that I was in a library, and circumstantially I found that surprising those close to me is actually one of my personality traits. More on that later). I was looking for a book on Nihilism, as I was just randomly intrigued by the notion that everything is nothing, which indirectly came about from visiting the Philosophy section of The Matrix web site.

     Anyway, the book is called Please Understand Me written by Keirsey and Bates. Out of curiosity I read the first pages of the intro and I was hooked. The book describes 16 personality types and goes into how these groups of people think, learn, communicate, and more. After taking their "personality sorter" test, I found that I was an INTP. This is most likely gibberish to you so, let me explain what that means.

     The first letter I stands for "introverted," which basically means I feel most comfortable when not in the presence of others. N stands for "intuitive," which boils down to me preferring to look at the big picture and only to interpret details in their relationship with something greater. I'm the kind of person who thinks of "what can be" instead of "what is." The T stands for "thinking," which means that I tend to think my way through situations as opposed to feeling my way through. And the P stands for "perceiving" which basically means, in my own words, lazy bastard.

     The 70 question test seemed like utter nonsense as I went through it however, I must say that the end result was nothing less than astonishing. The description for my personality was right on the money for the most part. First off, I've always felt that I was alone on this craptacular planet. No one ever seemed to see things the way I do. The very first paragraph of this description makes it quite clear that my type is rare. The passage uses a classroom analogy to illustrate this. In a classroom of 32 kids, 4 of them would be NTs (root temperament) and only one of those four would be introverted. So, there I am, just one in 32. The book also says we must feel like aliens and every now and then I do feel as if I'm on the wrong planet. With that said it made my past experiences with other people a little more understandable for me. Quite simply, I think differently than others. And in a world where having things in common is more appreciated than not, this makes it hard for me to relate on a deep level with a wide range of people. Now you know a little of where I'm coming from, so now let's get in a little deeper...

     I'm gonna go into more detail about how each letter represents me. To start off let's go to the end. The last letter P. For me, this letter represents a wildcard. This is the sign of randomness in my personality. One of the things that the INTP description states is that this type is a skill-collector. This definitely suits me. I'm very skill oriented and want to learn as many different types of skills and disciplines as I can however, I don't always go at something with tenacity because I just end up losing interest. I guess this makes me a little inconsistent. But, this also makes me very flexible, as I am not a person who is at all stuck in his ways. In fact I tend to question all that I know on a daily basis and I hunger for more knowledge with the goal of refining that knowledge or skill.

     I mentioned earlier that my type has a tendency to surprise people. That's because of that random seed. Today, I may be enthralled by this and the next day be enamored with its opposite. I am by no means a concrete character and I want to change, for the better, every day of my life. There are some things about me that will never change but, they are few and far in between. I'm always looking for a better way, something more interesting. I live in anticipation.

   Now onto the T...

     One of the reasons I created this website was to bring my "thinking function" to the forefront. I am not one to think out loud and therefore the only thoughts that appear in my head fully baked are ever spoken. I don't like to voice opinions that I'm still debating in my mind. To me they're unrefined, not-ready-for-prime-time thoughts that need time to be developed fully so they can be the best they can be. Well, this entire website is being constructed from my half baked thoughts, I'm not trying to make this the best thing since the Sega Dreamcast.

     My tendency to refine my thoughts ties into my introvertedness. I usually feel most comfortable when I'm alone developing said thoughts. So, I tend to be a more objective person because of this. I use logic when problem solving and I also tend to view an argument from several different sides. Although I am lightning quick at breaking down problems it takes me time to view them from several different perspectives and then compare them to synthesize an answer.

     [This thought process often renders me ineffective in say, a class discussion. Conversation is, of course, a two way street. I listen incredibly well and can read between the lines to get to what a person means. However, I'm always slow to respond because I need time to view your argument from several viewpoints and produce my fully baked answer. Other people may instead just blurt out whatever and maybe much later come up with a solution. Not so with me, just give me ten minutes and I can get to the bottom of it and end the discussion... (Unless, of course, I lose interest and zone out :^ ) Random... ) Which brings me back to the class discussion thing. I sometimes find myself listening to my other classmates expressing their thoughts but, I'm done synthesizing so everything I hear sounds so last week to me. I've already dissected their argument and I'm already synthesizing maybe another two or three arguments in order to form a final opinion. Where am I to jump into this conversation? I'm about three steps ahead and if I tried to bring everyone up to speed I'd just confuse everyone. And sometimes I don't finish synthesizing because it takes me longer than class time allows and when it's time to leave I just drop everything going on in my head and move on to something else. (Randomness strikes again). However, on those rare occasions I do finish my synthesis and voice my opinion I often get horrible results... My ideas are so concrete, well developed and complex they have the effect of turning the entire class into a room of drooling retards…]

   Next is the N…

     This characteristic has to do with the way that I take in information. Let me reiterate that the way I see things is completely different from the way others do. My observations are never, and I mean never, based on taking something at face value. I always look for deeper meaning in all things. It's not that I think everything is connected and that everything happens for a reason. (I think that some things truly are random and have no grounds in relating to logic.) But, I find that what really interests me are ulterior motives, cause and effect relationships, and how things relate to one another.

     My method of taking in information basically assumes the obvious very quickly and then moves onto placing that information with others like it and creating a "grand scheme of things," if you will.

Peek-a-boo!


     For example, take a look at that simple drawing. What do you see? Stop and gather your thoughts for a second before you go on reading...
     Now most people would say sunrise/sunset. Not me. Well… actually if I weren't writing about this on my web page or I was in an unfamiliar situation, I would say a sunrise/sunset as well. My other thoughts I would keep to myself because other people would just see them as odd.

     However, to illustrate just how differently I think from most, I'll tell you what's going on in my head when I see this picture. Alright, so the first thought in my head is the sunrise/sunset thing but that is absolutely, positively, so horribly obvious that my brain, true to my temperament, acknowledges it for maybe a nanosecond and then moves on. So here's what comes next…

     The interpretation that comes immediately after that one is that of an "egg-shaped being" peeking (although it has no eyes) over a table to see what is there. Were you thinking that? Hell no you weren't. (However, if you were and you're female, please email me, I would like to marry you.) Let me explain that train of thought a little bit. When someone sees the sunrise/sunset image for the most part it's a static image to them, although the sun and the earth are both moving it's so slow to us that we don't see the difference minute by minute. An egg peeking over a desk on the other hand, to me, is not even static, it's a series of images. So while most people see only a static image, I see an image that exists only as a portion of a whole. I'm into the grand scheme of things and I want to understand more about an object's place in the world, and not just the object itself.

     Of course there are pros and cons to this style of information ingestion. The pros being that I can break apart complex problems quickly and efficiently, and I can spot a smoke screen a mile away. The cons include, misinterpreting something as complex and working feverishly at a solution that does not exist. This sometimes creates major problems for me in that I'm looking for the "catch 22" and the joke is really on me.

     The last letter is I…

     Me, myself and I. That's who I trust. That's who I know best. I'm an introvert through and through. I'm not particularly fond of people in general. However, I am fond of specific persons. Don't get it twisted, what I'm saying is I like to avoid large crowds (small ones too…) because I find the atmosphere fleeting and nonproductive. I like to get to know people on a more coherent level. Having fun is cool, but making sense is cooler.

     You know how people get in crowds. One person goes nuts, everybody catches the fever and all of a sudden you're either surrounded by idiots or you indulge and become one yourself. Now Thomas Jefferson once said, "In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock." Well, I guess everything is a matter of principle to me. I don't ever follow the status quo unless a) I find that I agree with it or b) I haven't figured out a better way yet and I need to act on something now. That's just me, and I can't seem to shake it. So, I'm gonna go with it 'til I die.

     Another good way of putting this preference into perspective was stated in the Keirsey and Bates book. People who are introverted recharge their batteries when they are alone whereas people who are extroverted recharge when they are with other people. Like most things in life you must strike some sort of balance and get a good helping of both types of situations but, everyone has a preference one way or the other that shows in their lifestyle.

     So, there you have it. A good start for those who care to undertake the task of getting to know me. There's lots that you can learn about yourself by figuring out your personality type. If you want to dabble a little bit I recommend this approach whole-heartedly but, remember that this stuff isn't about pigeon-holing people. We're all complex beings and your personality type is only a portion of who you are. Everyday experiences, societal conditioning, and even peer pressure all play a part in determining who you are and can even obscure portions of your innate psyche thereby, (seemingly) altering your whole being. This is just a beginning to advancing towards a state of self-realization. Like the Keirsey-Bates book says, acknowledge and appreciate for the differences you find in others are often good, not bad. (Kick it to the links page and hit up the personality links for more info.)